College Football Week 6 Awards October 6, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: Akron, Arizona State, Arkansas, Army, Auburn, Ball State, Baylor, Big XII, Boise State, Boston College, Bret Bielema, Buckeyes, Butch Jones, BYU, Cincinnati, Clemson, Colorado, Dave Doeren, Duke, Eastern Michigan, Florida State, Gamecocks, Gary Pinkel, Georgia, Georgia Tech, Indiana, Iowa State, James Franklin, Kansas, Kentucky, Larry Fedora, Louisiana Tech, LSU, Mark Richt, Maryland, Miami (Ohio), Mississippi State, Missouri, N.C. State, NFL, North Carolina, Northwestern, Notre Dame, Ohio State, Ohio U, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Ole Miss, Oregon, Paul Rhoads, Penn State, Pittssburgh, Rutgers, SMU, South Carolina, South Florida, Stanford, Steve Spurrier, TCU, Tennessee, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Troy, UMass, Urban Meyer, Utah State, UTEP, Vanderbilt, Virginia, Virginia Tech, Washington, Western Carolina, Western Michigan
add a comment
(Note: All rankings are current AP [week 6] unless otherwise noted.)
COACHES
Wish I were him: Urban Meyer, Ohio State
Glad I’m not him: James Franklin, Vanderbilt
Lucky guy: Mark Richt, Georgia, and also Mack Brown, Texas
Poor guy: Butch Jones, Tennessee, and also Paul Rhoads, Iowa State
Desperately seeking a clue: Mack Brown, Texas
Desperately seeking a P.R. man: Gary Pinkel, Missouri
Desperately seeking sunglasses and a fake beard: Dave Doeren, NC State
Desperately seeking … anything: Larry Fedora, North Carolina
TEAMS
Thought you’d kick butt, you did: No. 20 Texas Tech (defeated Kansas 54-16)
Thought you’d kick butt, you didn’t: South Carolina (defeated Kentucky 35-28)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you did: Colorado (lost to Oregon 57-16)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you didn’t: Troy (lost to Duke 38-31)
Thought you wouldn’t kick butt, you did: Ohio U (defeated Akron 43-3)
Dang, they’re good: Florida State
Dang, they’re bad: Akron
Can’t Stand Prosperity: Arizona State
The Fix is in: Texas
Did the season start? Cincinnati
Can the season end? Western Michigan
Can the season never end? Baylor
GAMES
Play this again: No. 6 Georgia 34, Tennessee 31
Play this again, too: Rutgers 55, SMU 53, 3OT
Never play this again: No. 8 Florida State 63, No. 25 Maryland 0
What? Ball State 48, Virginia 27
Huh? Missouri 51, Vanderbilt 28
Are you kidding me? South Florida 26, Cincinnati 20
Oh – my – God: Indiana 44 Penn State 24
NEXT WEEK
(rankings are current AP (post-week 6, pre-week 7)
Ticket to die for: Texas vs. No. 12 Oklahoma in the Red River Shootout (Dallas)
Best non-Big Six vs. Big Six matchup: Georgia Tech @ BYU
Best non-Big Six matchup: Boise State @ Utah State
Upset alert: No. 14 South Carolina @ Arkansas
Must win: No. 9 Texas A&M @ Ole Miss
Offensive explosion: No. 2 Oregon @ No. 15 Washington
Defensive struggle: Miami (Ohio) @ UMass
Great game no one is talking about: Pittsburgh @ No. 24 Virginia Tech, or, No. 19 Northwestern @ Wisconsin.
Intriguing coaching matchup: Steve Spurrier of South Carolina vs. Bret Bielema of Arkansas
Who’s bringing the body bags? No. 3 Clemson @ Boston College
Why are they playing? Western Carolina @ Auburn
Plenty of good seats remaining: Eastern Michigan @ Army
They shoot horses, don’t they? Temple @ Cincinnati
Week 6 in Review:
There are times when in hindsight you know that you should have trusted your instincts instead of trying to out-think the room (which, let us be honest, can never end well. Just ask the NFL when they decided to put the upcoming Super Bowl in frigid New Jersey). Case in point: last week, yours truly tried to out-think the room – against my own better judgement – in prediciting that this week’s “offensive explosion” would be Ohio State @ Northwestern. Yes, it was a good game, worthy of a Musburger-Herbstreit broadcast tandem. And yes, the overall score was not exactly paltry at 40-30 (in favor of the Buckeyes, naturally). But then there was Baylor vs. West Virginia, whose score was so high, we needed our collective oxygen tank (final score: 73-42). What was my main reticence in following my instincts and selecting this game for a more accurate prognostication? The fact that West Virginia has been wildly inconsistent this year. One week they embarrass themselves against Maryland, the next week, they upset Oklahoma State. Right now, we the fans do not know what team we are getting week-to-week with the Mountaineers.
All Good Games at Night?
Aside from the satisfying SEC slugfest between Georgia and Tennessee in the 3:30 time slot, and the 3-OT shootout between Rutgers and SMU, all the good games this past week were in the evening. LSU vs. Mississippi State (3 out of 4 quarters, at least), South Florida vs. Cincinnati (surprisingly), Ole Miss vs. Auburn, TCU vs. Oklahoma, Kentucky vs. South Carolina (the Gamecocks allowed for it to be a good game, regrettably), Notre Dame vs. Arizona State, Ohio State vs. Northwestern, Washington vs. Stanford, even Louisiana Tech vs. UTEP (!) all turned out to be competitive, engaging matchups. It was one of those nights where you wished you had four or five flatscreens, all right next to each other, so as to enjoy as much simultaneous action as possible.
A Tale of Two Rivals.
Oklahoma did it the right way. They played a highly respected TCU bunch in a close, hard-fought game, and triumphed in the end, 20-17. There is a school of thought, not one without merit, that states that this is the perfect approach before throwing down the following week with a bitter rival. To follow this line of logic, the Sooners are well-prepared for the Red River Shootout this upcoming week.
On the other side of the coin is Texas, who thought that they could beat up on Big XII lightweight Iowa State as a tune-up. As things turned out, they needed not one, but two scandalous calls by the referees to get their behinds out of some seriously hot water (basically, two “gift” calls of not recognizing fumbles as actual fumbles). Let that sink in for a moment.
College Football Week 4 Awards September 22, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: Akron, Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Big XII, Bobby Petrino, body bag, Boise State, Bowling Green, Brady Hoke, Bronco Mendenhall, BYU, Central Florida, Central Michigan, Colorado State, Dana Holgersen, David Shaw, Duke, FIU, Florida, Florida A&M, Florida International, Fresno State, Georgia, Georgia Tech, Iowa, Jim McElwain, Kansas State, Ken Niumatalolo, Kent State, Kyle Flood, Louisville, LSU, Mark Dantonio, Maryland, Miami, Michigan, Michigan State, Middle Tennessee State, Mississippi State, MTSU, Navy, Nick Saban, Notre Dame, Ohio State, Oklahoma, P.J. Fleck, Pac-12, Pittsburgh, Rutgers, South Alabama, South Carolina, South Florida, Stanford, Tennessee, Texas, Texas A&M, Tim DeRuyter, Troy, UCF, UCLA, UConn, Virginia Tech, Washington, West Virginia, Western Kentucky, Western Michigan, Wisconsin
add a comment
(Note: All rankings are current AP [week 4] unless otherwise noted.)
COACHES
Wish I were him: David Shaw, Stanford
Glad I’m not him: Mark Dantonio, Michigan State
Lucky guy: Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State
Poor guy: Bronco Mendenhall, BYU
Desperately seeking a wake-up call: Brady Hoke, Michigan
Desperately seeking a P.R. man: Kyle Flood, Rutgers
Desperately seeking sunglasses and a fake beard: Dana Holgersen, West Virginia
Desperately seeking … anything: P.J. Fleck, Western Michigan
TEAMS
Thought you’d kick butt, you did: No. 7 Louisville (defeated FIU 72-0)
Thought you’d kick butt, you didn’t: No. 11 Michigan (defeated UConn 24-21)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you did: Troy (lost to Mississippi State 62-7)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you didn’t: Colorado State* (lost to No. 1 Alabama 31-6)
Thought you wouldn’t kick butt, you did: Iowa (defeated Western Michigan 59-3)
Dang, they’re good: Stanford
Dang, they’re bad: Western Michigan
Can’t Stand Prosperity: Arkansas
Did the season start? Michigan State
Can the season end? Central Michigan
Can the season never end? UCLA
GAMES
Play this again: Fresno State 41, Boise State 40
Play this again, too: Pittsburgh 58, Duke 55
Never play this again: No. 4 Ohio State 76, Florida A&M 0
What? Iowa 59, Western Michigan 3
Huh? Fresno State 41, Boise State 40
Are you kidding me? Texas 31, Kansas State 21
Oh – my – God: Maryland 37, West Virginia 0
NEXT WEEK
(rankings are current AP (post-week 3, pre-week 4)
Ticket to die for: No. 6 LSU @ No. 9 Georgia
Best non-Big Six vs. Big Six matchup: Northern Illinois @ Purdue
Best non-Big Six matchup: Navy @ Western Kentucky (honorable mention: Akron @ Bowling Green)
Upset alert: No. 23 Wisconsin @ No. 4 Ohio State, or, No. 12 South Carolina @ Central Florida
Must win: No. 10 Texas A&M @ Arkansas
Offensive explosion: Arizona @ No. 16 Washington
Defensive struggle: MTSU @ BYU
Great game no one is talking about: Virginia Tech @ Georgia Tech (Thurs.)
Intriguing coaching matchup: Ken Niumatalolo of Navy vs. Bobby Petrino of Western Kentucky
Who’s bringing the body bags? South Florida @ No. 15 Miami
Why are they playing? South Alabama @ Tennessee
Plenty of good seats remaining: Kent State @ Western Michigan
They shoot horses, don’t they? Troy @ Duke
Week 4 in Review:
*: This was the “body bag” game that did not quite turn out to be one. On paper, Colorado State was to be the lamb being led to the slaughter. After all, the fortunes of the Rams have been nothing like the halcyon days under former head coach Sonny Lubick. Moreover, in a week where every other game seemed to be a body bag game, this one should have been no different. Consider an under-performing Mountain West Conference team journeying over a thousand miles from Fort Collins, Colo., to Tuscaloosa, Ala., only to go into one of the most hostile places in the land in which to play football, with none other than Nick Saban, arguably the best coach in the business, to be the pitiless executioner.
All things considered, the 31-6 loss could have been much worse. The Rams actually did a good job of gaining yardage against the Crimson Tide. The only problem was, the bulk of that yardage was between the 20 yard-lines. Once Colorado State made it into the red zone, Alabama started to show more of its true defensive colors, as the score attests. Still, head coach Jim McElwain – coincidentally, the former offensive coordinator at Alabama – came in with a sound game plan, and that was to keep his team’s offense on the field for as long as possible, and conversely, to keep Alabama’s offense off the field as long as possible. They took plenty of risks – including lots of screen passes – in order to try to make that happen. One thing that was particularly telling of some degree of success in the overall game plan, despite the loss, was that Saban kept his headset on and kept coaching his team literally as the final second of the fourth quarter ticked off the clock. One normally does not see that sort of behavior from a coach – no matter how skilled they are in the business – during a so-called “body bag” game.
But this game aside, even some of the better matches on paper (say, Tennessee at Florida, or Michigan State at Notre Dame) turned out to be exercises in ineptitude on both sides of the ball. Even Purdue, who acquitted themselves well against Notre Dame last week, came out flat against Wisconsin this week.
Speaking of “body bag” games, though, this weekend was lousy with them. Records have become so important in terms of one’s BCS standings, that teams have largely become risk-averse, and since most conferences do not mandate that at least nine conference games be scheduled (notwithstanding the Big XII and Pac-12), we the fans had to suffer through lots of garbage matchups (hello, Florida A&M @ Ohio State) this past week. Next week will thankfully be different, though, as most teams have some sort of conference game, and even those that do not still [mostly] have some interesting opponent to play (e.g., Northern Illinois at Purdue, South Carolina at an up-and-coming UCF, Oklahoma at Notre Dame, and Navy at Western Kentucky). The bottom line is, let us blot this past week out of our memories, and just look forward to that which is immediately ahead.
College Football Week 3 Awards September 15, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: 40 Acres, Aggies, Akron, Alabama, Arizona State, Baylor, Boilermakers, Boise State, Boston College, Brian Kelly, BYU, Central Florida, Charlie Strong, Crimson Tide, Florida, Florida A&M, Florida International, Florida State, Fresno State, Gary Andersen, Gary Patterson, George O'Leary, Georgia Tech, Greg Robinson, Hawaii, Johnny Football, Johnny Manziel, Kansas State, Longhorns, Louisiana-Monroe, Louisville, Mack Brown, Mark Dantonio, Mark Helfrich, Michigan, Michigan State, Nevada, North Carolina, Notre Dame, Ohio State, Ole Miss, Oregon, Oregon Sate, Penn State, Purdue, Rebels, Ron Turner, South Alabama, South Florida, TCU, Tennessee, Texas, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Todd Graham, USC, Utah, Utah State, UTEP, UTSA, Weber, Western Kentucky, Willie Taggert, Wisconsin, Zips
add a comment
(Note: All rankings are current AP [week 3] unless otherwise noted.)
COACHES
Wish I were him: Mark Helfrich, Oregon
Glad I’m not him: Gary Patterson, TCU
Lucky guy: Todd Graham, Arizona State
Poor guy: Gary Andersen, Wisconsin
Desperately seeking a wake-up call: Charlie Strong, Louisville
Desperately seeking a P.R. man: George O’Leary, Central Florida
Desperately seeking sunglasses and a fake beard: Ron Turner, Florida International
Desperately seeking … anything: Willie Taggert, South Florida
TEAMS
Thought you’d kick butt, you did: No. 10 Florida State (defeated Nevada 62-7)
Thought you’d kick butt, you didn’t: No. 11 Michigan (defeated Akron 28-24)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you did: Tennessee (lost to No. 2 Oregon 59-14)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you didn’t: Purdue (lost to No. 21 Notre Dame 31-24)
Thought you wouldn’t kick butt, you did: USC (defeated Boston College 35-7)
Dang, they’re good: Oregon
Dang, they’re bad: Florida International
Can’t Stand Prosperity: Penn State
Did the season start? Texas
Can the season end? South Florida
Can the season never end? Ole Miss
GAMES
Play this again: No. 1 Alabama 49, No. 6 Texas A&M 42
Play this again, too: Oregon State 51, Utah 48
Never play this again: Utah State 70, Weber 6
What? Arizona State 32, No. 20 Wisconsin 30
Huh? South Alabama 31, Western Kentucky 24
Are you kidding me? Texas Tech 20, No. 24 TCU 10
Oh – my – God: Central Florida 34, Penn State 31
NEXT WEEK
(rankings are current AP (post-week 3, pre-week 4)
Ticket to die for: Tennessee @ No. 19 Florida
Best non-Big Six vs. Big Six matchup: Utah State @ USC
Best non-Big Six matchup: Boise State @ Fresno State
Upset alert: Purdue @ No. 24 Wisconsin
Must win: Kansas State @ Texas
Offensive explosion: Boise State @ Fresno State
Defensive struggle: Hawaii @ Nevada
Great game no one is talking about: Utah @ BYU, or, North Carolina @ Georgia Tech
Intriguing coaching matchup: Mark Dantonio of Michigan State vs. Brian Kelly of No. 22 Notre Dame
Who’s bringing the body bags? Florida International @ No. 7 Louisville
Why are they playing? Florida A&M @ No. 4 Ohio State
Plenty of good seats remaining: UTSA @ UTEP
They shoot horses, don’t they? Louisiana-Monroe @ No. 20 Baylor
Week 3 in Review:
The game that has been billed by the media and built up in the minds of many a fan nationwide certainly lived up to its billing/hype yesterday. No. 1-ranked Alabama is sure to retain atop the mountain of college football rankings after defeating the home team No. 6 Texas A&M in a thriller of a game. The key to the success of the Crimson Tide was figuring out how to contain the Aggies’ QB Johnny Manziel, by not allowing him sufficient access to the outsides of the hash marks and instead forcing him inside, up the middle (both of running and throwing) as a means of containing the threat of his talents. In the end, it worked. Best of all, “Johnny Football” seemed surprisingly humble, contrite, and team-oriented during the postgame press conference. After witnessing all of his antics the previous weeks, this was a rather pleasing development. Time will tell if he truly did learn a lesson or two from this loss, or whether he will devolve back to the cocky, reckless punk he was earlier.
Other random thoughts:
A curious case of both Michigan and Notre Dame arose this past Saturday. The former team had to struggle at home to beat the Akron Zips, and only doing so in the last minutes of play. Meanwhile, Notre Dame, an ostensibly revitalized, nationally viable team under head coach Brian Kelly, had to earn – in every sense of the word – a win against a Purdue team whose performance prior to this game was suspect at best. Perhaps this strange case is a result of a hangover from big game between the two the following week. Lots of media hype and team energy went into that game, and as anybody who has any real experience in college football can tell you, one of the biggest challenges in the sport is trying to get 19-20 year-olds to play consistently week in and week out. Or, it could be at both Akron and Purdue are better than we thought they were. Concerning the latter, it could have been that the Boilers were looking past Indiana State (could you blame them?) and devoted some extra prep time to dealing with the Fighting Irish. Certainly a plausible scenario, no? What remains intriguing about this case is that, in all likelihood, Michigan and Notre Dame will be just fine. But it could also be that Akron and Purdue are on the rise from the doldrums in which both programs have been stuck for the past several years. Time will tell.
Meanwhile, Texas lost another game, this time at home, against a respectable opponent in Ole Miss. The Longhorns were supposed to have gotten things together, so we were told. After all, before last week’s BYU debacle (in which they lost 40-21), they were ranked No. 15 in the nation. This week, the Rebels came into Austin ranked #25. Yet the Horns lost again, this time 44-23. It is conceivable that Texas could turn things around and that the defense could get more settled under new defensive coordinator Greg Robinson. Or, it could be that the wheels are coming off the program, and as much as Longhorn Nation likes head coach Mack Brown personally, it is time for a changing of the guard. Right now, though, things are not looking good on the 40 Acres, and the prognosis for the second Saturday in October is not that rosy, either.
College Football Week 2 Awards 2013 September 9, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: Baylor, Boise State, Bowling Green, Brady Hoke, Buffalo, Bulldogs, BYU, Cincinnati, college, Colorado, Dave Clawson, East Carolina, Florida, Florida Atlantic, Florida International, football, Fresno State, Gamecocks, Gary Patterson, Gators, Georgia, Greg Robinson, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Iowa State, Kentucky, Kevin Wilson, Kliff Kingsbury, Lamar, Lane Kiffin, Longhorns, Louisiana-Lafayette, Mack Brown, Manny Diaz, Marshall, Miami (FL), Miami (OH), Michigan, Michigan State, Mike Leach, Navy, NCAA, Nebraska, Nicholls, Notre Dame, Ohio State, Ohio U, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Ole Miss, Oregon, Purdue, Ron Turner, San Diego State, South Carolina, South Florida, Syracuse, TCU, Tennessee-Martin, Texas, Texas Tech, Tommy Tuberville, UCLA, USC, Vanderbilt, Virginia, Virginia Tech, Washington State, West Virginia
add a comment
(Note: All rankings are current AP [week 2] unless otherwise noted.)
COACHES
Wish I were him: Brady Hoke, Michigan
Glad I’m not him: Tommy Tuberville, Cincinnati
Lucky guy: Mike Leach, Washington State
Poor guy: Lane Kiffin, USC
Desperately seeking a wake-up call: Kevin Wilson, Indiana
Desperately seeking a P.R. man: Dave Clawson, Bowling Green
Desperately seeking sunglasses and a fake beard: Mack Brown, Texas
Desperately seeking … anything: Ron Turner, Florida International
TEAMS
Thought you’d kick butt, you did: No. 23 Baylor (defeated Buffalo 70-13)
Thought you’d kick butt, you didn’t: Michigan State (defeated South Florida 21-6)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you did: Virginia (lost to Oregon 59-10)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you didn’t: South Florida (lost to Michigan State 21-6)
Thought you wouldn’t kick butt, you did: Kentucky (defeated Miami (OH, 41-7)
Dang, they’re good: Oregon
Sir Charles says “They’re Turrable”: Buffalo
Can’t Stand Prosperity: Texas
Did the season start? Florida
Can the season end? San Diego State
Can the season never end? Michigan
GAMES
Play this again: No. 11 Georgia 41, No. 6 South Carolina 30
Play this again, too: No. 17 Michigan 41, No. 11 Notre Dame 30
Never play this again: Boise St. 63, Tennessee-Martin 14
What? Illinois 45, Cincinnati 16
Huh? Miami (FL) 21, No. 12 Florida 16
Are you kidding me? Navy 41, Indiana 35
Oh – my – God: BYU 40, No. 15 Texas 21
NEXT WEEK
(rankings are current AP (post-week 2, pre-week 3)
Ticket to die for: No. 1 Alabama @ No. 6 Texas A&M
Best non-Big Six vs. Big Six matchup: Virginia Tech @ East Carolina
Best non-Big Six matchup: Marshall @ Ohio U
Upset alert: No. 25 Ole Miss @ Texas
Must win: Vanderbilt @ No. 13 South Carolina
Offensive explosion: Fresno State @ Colorado
Defensive struggle: Iowa @ Iowa State
Great game no one is talking about: No. 16 UCLA @ No. 23 Nebraska
Intriguing coaching matchup: Gary Patterson of No. 24 TCU vs. Kliff Kingsbury of Texas Tech
Who’s bringing the body bags? No. 21 Notre Dame @ Purdue
Why are they playing? Lamar @ No. 12 Oklahoma State
Plenty of good seats remaining: Florida Atlantic @ South Florida
They shoot horses, don’t they? Nicholls @ Louisiana-Lafayette
Week 2 in Review:
Two really good games followed each other consecutively in South Carolina @ Georgia followed by Notre Dame @ Michigan. In the case of the former, the Gamecocks’ season is not lost by losing to a tough Bulldogs squad who had their collective backs against the wall after blowing the season opener on the road to perhaps the best Clemson team that school’s history. Conversely, had Georgia lost two games in a row to start off their season, no matter if they won out for the remaining weeks, the season, by team’s and fans’ standard would have been clearly lost.
In the case of the latter, some degree of poetic justice was achieved in the Wolverine’s victory over the Fighting Irish. It is understandable why Notre Dame saw fit not to renew the rivalry on their schedule, what with trying to broaden their geographic outreach into the recruiting hotbeds, which, to remind certain fanbases, are NOT in the Midwest anymore (Ohio notwithstanding, to an extent, but Ohio State owns that anyhow, and should). But that does not obfuscate the other understandable situation where the Michigan fanbase feels snubbed by a team that still acts as though it is “above it all.” Did I say “poetic justice”? How about vindication?
Meanwhile, going forward, it is worth pointing out that when it comes to the prognostications for the upcoming week, the two most difficult things to predict are the offensive explosion and the defensive struggle. The Michigan-Notre Dame game certainly did not live up to the latter billing (41-30); neither did the West Virginia-Oklahoma game (16-7). One should have reversed those two games into opposite categories, and then we would have had something (in 20-20 hindsight, at least)!
Oh, and the latest news has it that Texas’ defensive coordinator Manny Diaz has taken the fall for the Longhorns’ ignominious loss to unranked BYU. The Horns gave up a school record 550 rushing yards on defense. This means that even though Texas had some very bad teams in the 1980s and some of the 1990s, even they did not give up that much yardage on the ground in a game. Something obviously had to be done. Mack Brown has appointed Greg Robinson (former Syracuse head coach – one of those guys who is better as a vice president than as a chief executive) as the new defensive coordinator, a role that he actually already served in for the team in 2004 (that same team that came back to beat Michigan in the Rose Bowl). On paper, it is a good hire; time will tell if what is on paper will manifest in reality. But regardless, it’s still a step up from the inept display the Longhorn Nation had to endure yesterday.
College Football Week 1 Awards 2013 September 4, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: Air Force, Alabama, Arkansas, Auburn, Baylor, Bill Snyder, Bobby Petrino, Boise State, Buffalo, Butch Jones, BYU, Cincinnati, Clemson, college, Dabo Swinney, Eastern Illinois, Eastern Washington, FBC, FCS, Florida, football, Georgia, Hugh Freeze, Idaho, Indiana, Indiana State, Iowa State, James Franklin, Jordan-Hare, K-State, Kansas State, Kentucky, Kevin Wilson, LSU, Mark Richt, McNeese State, Miami (OH), Michigan, Mike Riley, Mississippi, Missouri, NCAA, Nebraska, Nicholls State, North Carolina, North Dakota State, Northern Iowa, Northwestern, Notre Dame, Ohio State, Oklahoma, Ole Miss, Oregon, Oregon State, Purdue, Rocky Long, San Diego State, Sanford, SEC, South Alabama, South Carolina, South Florida, Southern Utah, Syracuse, Tennessee, Tennessee-Martin, Toledo, Towson, Tulane, Utah State, Vanderbilt, Virginia Tech, West Virginia, Western Kentucky, Wyoming
add a comment
That special time of year has come yet again, when college football teams all throughout the land knock heads to see who is the best. Moreover, now that the first week of college football has past, it is now time to give out the first weekly awards for the year!
(NOTE: all rankings are Week 1 AP up to “Next Week”, in which case they are for Week 2)
COACHES
Wish I were him: Dabo Swinney, Clemson
Glad I’m not him: Mark Richt, Georgia
Lucky guy: Hugh Freeze, Ole Miss
Poor guy: James Franklin, Vanderbilt
Desperately seeking a wake-up call: Bill Snyder, Kansas State
Desperately seeking a P.R. man: Kevin Wilson, Indiana
Desperately seeking sunglasses and a fake beard: Mike Riley, Oregon State
Desperately seeking … anything: Rocky Long, San Diego State
TEAMS
Thought you’d kick butt, you did: No. 3 Oregon (beat Nicholls State 66-3)
Thought you’d kick butt, you didn’t: No. 18 Nebraska (beat Wyoming 37-34)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you did: Purdue (lost to Cincinnati 42-7)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you didn’t: North Carolina (lost to South Carolina 27-10)
Thought you wouldn’t kick butt, you did: Indiana 73, Indiana State 35
Dang, they’re good: Alabama
Sir Charles says “They’re Turrable”: San Diego State
Can’t Stand Prosperity: Georgia
Did the season start? BYU
Can the season end? Iowa State
Can the season never end? Clemson
GAMES
Play this again: No. 8 Clemson 38, No. 5 Georgia 35
Play this again, too: Ole Miss 39, Vanderbilt 35
Never play this again: Indiana 73, Indiana State 35
What? McNeese State 53, South Florida 21
Huh? Eastern Illinois 49, San Diego State 17
Are you kidding me? North Dakota State 24, Kansas State 21
Oh – my – God: Eastern Washington 49, No. 25 Oregon State 46
Told you so: Western Kentucky 35, Kentucky 26
NEXT WEEK
Ticket to die for: No. 6 South Carolina @ No. 11 Georgia
Best non-Big Six vs. Big Six matchup: Toledo @ Missouri
Best non-Big Six matchup: Idaho @ Wyoming, or Utah State @ Air Force
Upset alert: No. 14 Notre Dame @ No. 17 Michigan
Must win: Miami (OH) @ Kentucky
Offensive explosion: West Virginia @ No. 16 Oklahoma
Defensive struggle: No. 14 Notre Dame @ No. 17 Michigan
Great game no one is talking about: Syracuse @ No. 22 Northwestern
Intriguing coaching matchup: Bobby Petrino of Western Kentucky vs. Butch Jones of Tennessee
Who’s bringing the body bags? San Diego State @ No. 2 Ohio State
Why are they playing? Tennessee-Martin @ Boise State
Plenty of good seats remaining: South Alabama @ Tulane
They shoot horses, don’t they? Buffalo @ Baylor
The First Week in Review:
The previous week’s “Ticket to Die For” was obviously the Georgia-Clemson game, and it lived up to its billing, remaining close and hard-fought for all four quarters. Georgia fans do themselves and their team a disservice, however, by lamenting that their season is now in the tank and that it is time to jettison head coach Mark Richt. Let us keep in mind that Clemson right now is on fire, and has their best offense in roughly 30 years if not the whole history of the school. The Bulldogs losing to such a team at that moment is no disgrace.
That said, there’s no rest for the wicked regarding Georgia, for now their hated cross-border rival South Carolina comes to Sanford Stadium this next weekend. The Bulldogs might be in danger of starting the season 0-2, which which really send the UGA faithful into a panic.
Meanwhile, Alabama is such a good team, that even with several offensive miscues throughout the game, they still handily defeated a respectable Virginia Tech squad 35-10. Still, it was a rough week for the SEC. As somewhat prognosticated, Washington State did give Auburn plenty to deal with in their rather narrow loss at Jordan-Hare Stadium. Georgia’s rather heartbreaking loss in Clemson was already noted. Kentucky lost much worse than what the score (35-26) to Western Kentucky in Nashville, Tenn. Yes, I know that the last game mentioned is an outlier in that A, this is Kentucky we’re talking about here, not, say, LSU, South Carolina, Florida, Alabama, or even Auburn or Arkansas. On the other side of the coin, Western Kentucky is no ordinary Sunbelt Conference team, either, as they are coached by Bobby Petrino, likely giving the Hilltoppers a decisive edge over the rest of their conference competition, or even chronic SEC cellar-dwellers for that matter.
One thing that particularly sticks out about the past week, though, was the resounding success that FCS teams had over FBS teams. Time was — very recently — that when D-1A (pardon me, FBS) teams scheduled D-1AA (pardon me, FCS) teams for a game, it was an easy win for the former, and the latter got a relatively hefty paycheck (by their standards) to take a drubbing. Not anymore. Southern Utah beat South Alabama 22-21; Towson defeated UConn 33-18; North Dakota State upset Kansas State 24-21; Eastern Washington also upset Oregon State, 49-46; McNeese State thrashed South Florida, 53-21; Eastern Illinois did the drubbing on San Diego State, 40-19; if that’s not enough, Northern Iowa also beat Iowa State, 28-20. To be sure, most of the aforementioned FCS teams (Towson, E. Washington, E. Illinois, and N. Iowa) are ranked, whereas most of their defeated FBS counterparts are, well, sucking (yet it still does not account for K-State’s or Oregon State ignominious losses). Still, this is a powerful wake-up call that FBS vs. FCS are no longer gimme-games for the former. We’ve been warned.
College Football Opening Weekend 2013: What to watch August 29, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: Aaron Murray, ACC, Alabama, Arkansas, Arlington, Atlanta, Auburn, B1G, Bayou Bengals, Bearcats, Big 10, Big East, Big Ten, Bobby Petrino, Boilermakers, Brent Musburger, Brian Kelly, Bulldogs, Butch Jones, BYU, Cal, California, Cincinnati, Clemson, college, Cotton Bowl, Cougars, Cowboys, Crimson Tide, Dabo Swinney, Dallas, Dan Mullen, Darrell Hazell, FIU, Florida International, football, Fort Worth, Gary Patterson, Georgia, Giants, Golden Bears, Gus Malzahn, Herbie, Hilltoppers, Hokies, Horned Frogs, Kentucky, Kirk Herbstreit, Les Miles, Louisiana Tech, LSU, Mark Richt, Mark Stoops, Maryland, Mike Gundy, Mike Leach, Mississippi State, N.C. State, NCAA, New York, North Carolina, Northwestern, Notre Dame, Oklahoma State, Oregon, Pac-12, Pat Fitzgerald, Peach Bowl, Penn State, Purdue, Rose Bowl, Seahawks, Seattle, SEC, South Carolina, Syracuse, T. Boone Pickens, TCU, Tennessee, Tigers, Tommy Tuberville, USC, Virginia, Virginia Tech, Washington State, Western Kentucky, Wildcats
add a comment
Note: Rankings are based the ESPN-Coaches Poll, not the AP Poll as is usually the case on this blog.
Though many good games kick off the season on Thursday (hello, North Carolina @ South Carolina!) and Friday, the real action begins, as it always does, on Saturday (Aug. 31, in this case). Let us cut through the clutter and focus on the good games to watch.
Noon (12:00 PM, EDT): Let’s face it; in recent years, most noon games have been throw-away games (generally, lots of lower-tier Big Ten, ACC and Big East matchups). This seems to be mostly the case this time around, too (case in point: Florida International @ Maryland, which makes Louisiana Tech @ N.C. State look like a marquee game). Yet one game in this time slot is rather intriguing, that being Purdue @ Cincinnati. Both programs have new coaches. Purdue’s Darrell Hazell is working diligently to breathe new life into a program that has underachieved since the 2003-2004 season. Meanwhile, U-Cincy brought in Tommy Tuberville to provide some stability to a program that lost Brian Kelly to Notre Dame after the 2009 season, and just lost Butch Jones to Tennessee prior to this upcoming one. From a business managerial standpoint, the two new coaches make for an interesting study in contrast in that Hazell’s role is clearly turnaround CEO, while Tuberville’s role is that of caretaker to a program that Kelly built up quite well and Jones did reasonably well in maintaining. Talent-wise, it ought not to be close, as odds are the Bearcats could dust the Boilermakers. Nevertheless, this game is far more interesting than the rest of the game fare offered at noontime, and it goes without saying that this game merits a nod for “Intriguing Coaching Matchup” award.
3:30 PM EDT: Normally, one can always look forward to at least one strong SEC matchup during this time slot, but there are none to be had on this date. Syracuse @ Penn State makes for a poor substitute indeed. BYU @ Virginia is for more intriguing than that. Still…next!
With that said, a potentially good game that few people are talking about occurs at this same time, that being Mississippi State at Oklahoma State. The Bulldogs have grown in strength under head coach Dan Mullen, while the Cowboys have also grown in stature under Mike Gundy’s leadership (not to mention T. Boone Pickens’ money). Seeing these two teams butt heads could be very engaging.
5:30 PM EDT: Granted, this is not your traditional time slot for a Saturday game, but it’s the opening weekend, so who cares? If anybody doubts that Atlanta is one of THE epicenters of college football, then they would be well-served to take not that No. 1 Alabama opens the season in the Georgia Dome against Virginia Tech. On paper, it’s a decent matchup in that a top-tier SEC team is about to take on an upper-tier ACC team. But as decent as the Hokies are, the game could very well be a bloodbath, as odds are the Crimson Tide is going to roll. Still, it’s better than the 3:30 PM options.
7:00 PM EDT: Washington State @ Auburn — now we’re getting somewhere. We the fans are not treated to SEC vs Pac-12 matchups enough, in my estimation, so when it happens, it is always something to be relished. What makes this game especially interesting is that the dread pirate Mike Leach is trying to turn around the Cougars program while Guz Malzahn has just been brought in to revive the Tigers’ very quick fall from grace. Could be interesting, especially when one considers how a Pac-12 team not named USC can handle a hyper-hostile SEC stadium crowd.
The other interesting game that evening is the Western Kentucky vs. Kentucky game in Nashville, Tenn. This too merits an “Intriguing Coaching Matchup” nod in that it also pits first-year coaches at both schools, both of whom came there under radically different circumstances. Mark Stoops took the UK job as a top-rated assistant coach at Florida State, with the mission to turn around a perennially struggling Wildcats squad. Thus far he has made lots of recruiting hype, but the actual product he can deliver on the field remains to be seen. On the Hilltoppers’ end is Bobby Petrino, one of the best coaches in the business, but left his CEO job at Arkansas in disgrace and scandal. The WKU job is a rung or two down the ladder from the jobs he has previously had, thus is objective is twofold: maintain what predecessor Willie Taggart had already built (something at which he is more than adept), and also rehab his reputation. Look out for a possible Hilltopper upset over the Wildcats, as it is always dangerous to give Petrino more than a week to prepare for a game.
8:00 PM EDT: No. 5 Georgia @ No. 8 Clemson — easily the biggest game of the day, if not the whole weekend. Head Coach Mark Richt takes a loaded Bulldogs team led by talented QB Aaron Murray (no relation, sadly) in to Clemson to take on a Tigers program that Dabo Swinney has slowly yet quietly strengthened over the past several years (they did beat a strong LSU team in the Chick-Fil-A Bowl, after all). This will be a great opening test for the Bulldogs, who are no doubt looking to eventually unseat Alabama at the number one spot in both the conference and the nation. Odds also are that you will be “looking LIVE, at Memorial Stadium in Clemson, S.C.,” as in all likelihood this will be the game that Brent Musburger calls along with Kirk “Herbie” Herbstreit, folks!
9:00 PM EDT: No. 12 LSU vs. No. 20 TCU in Dallas (Arlington, Texas, specifically). Just as Atlanta has its season kickoff Peach Bowl with a SEC-ACC game, over the past few years, Dallas has endeavored to do the same thing with a season kickoff Cotton Bowl of sorts, usually bringing in an SEC and a Big XII team (though there has been the occasional SEC vs Pac-12 game thrown in sometimes, read: LSU vs. Oregon in 2011) as is the case this time. Les Miles almost always has the Tigers up for big games, while it will be a quasi-home game for the Horned Frogs as they have but a half-hour drive (at the most) from their home base in Fort Worth. Moreover, Gary Patterson has built up a strong program over the course of more than a decade, even recently taking TCU to a Rose Bowl just a couple of seasons ago. Moreover, though the Horned Frogs are ranked lower than the Bayou Bengals, they have the good fortune of playing LSU at the beginning of the season, which is historically when the team is most vulnerable to a loss.
10:30 PM EDT: No. 22 Northwestern at California. Normally, the only game one might find on the cable tv guide this late at night is a home game at Hawai’i. Not this time, though. This time, head coach Pat Fitzgerald takes his nimble Wildcats westward from Evanston, Ill., to the west coast. The rankings could be deceiving. Yes, on paper, Northwestern could possibly crush Cal. But that could easily be nullified because of geography. Take a team in the eastern or even central timezone out to the Pacific timezone, and strange things happen to them. Pro teams do not have this issue (say, the New York Giants journeying out to Seattle to play the Seahawks), because they’re older, more mature, and, well, professionals. But in the college game, folks*, you’re dealing with 19-20 year-old kids, who are far more apt to be out of their element when traveling such a distance. Let us also not forget that Northwestern’s internal clock will still be on Chicago time (9:30 PM), not San Francisco time (7:30 PM), which could also make a difference. One could therefore expect a close, hard-fought game, if not even an upset by the Golden Bears. That said, Pat Fitzgerald is one of the most underrated coaches in the business, and has proven to be very adept, time and again, at not only recruiting decent players into a school with the most academically-rigid standards in the Big Ten Conference, but also coaching them up to be competitive in that conference and in bowl games, too. No doubt he’ll have a trick or two up his proverbial sleeve to try to nullify the problems of geography and time discrepancy. We shall see soon enough, as that is why they line up and play.
* Another Musburger-ism, in case you missed the reference!
The Dinosaur Football Roster April 3, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Science, Sports.Tags: Brett Favre, dino, dinosaur, Dromiceiomimus, football, linebacker, Ornithomimus, position, roster, T-rex, wide receiver
add a comment
Ornithomimus/Dromiceiomimus (depending on your nomenclatural school of thought) would make an ideal wide receiver within the world of dinos, according to a paleontologist. Photo and drawing by author.
Holy cow is this awesome! Spencer Hall of Every Day Should Be Saturday interviewed a vertebrate paleontologist who gave him the break-down on what dinosaur species would be the best football players at different positions. In yet another cool instance of where science meets sports, it doesn’t get much better than this!
The only flaw I could discern in the blog article is with one of the photo montages. The scientist explicitly said that T-rex would make the best middle linebacker (and I concur!), but they superimposed a Raptor head from Jurassic Park on Ray Lewis instead of that of a Tyrannosaurus head like they should have. True, both were carnivorous Theropods, but T-rex was much larger, robust species, whereas the Raptors, like the other Dromaeosaurids, were smaller and more nimble, thought arguably pound-for-pound, even more ferocious than the King Tyrant Lizard (whose head they stuck on Brett Favre instead!). Spoiler alert: in the article, Dromaeosaurids are, not surprisingly, given a place on the roster, too!
NCAA Men’s Basketball Awards, post-Round 2 March 25, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: Akron, Andy Endfield, award, basketball, bracket, Butler, college, Dr. John Giannini, Duke, Florida, Florida Gulf Coast, Georgetown, Gonzaga, Gregg Marshall, Hades, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa State, IU, John Groce, John Thompson III, Kentucky, LaSalle, Louisville, Mark Few, Marquette, Miami, Michigan State, Minnesota, NCAA, NIT, North Carolina A&T, Oklahoma State, Oregon, Rick Pitino, round, St. Louis, Syracuse, Tom Creen, tournament, tourney, U of L, UCLA, VCU, Wichita State
add a comment
I’m not the most knowledgeable person about college basketball or roundball in general, but the developments over the first two rounds led me to notice that some of the awards I usually bestow at the end of each regular season week of college football might also apply during this, the 2013 NCAA men’s basketball tourney.
It’s been an interesting one thus far, what with some key upsets that have shot many a person’s bracket to Hades. Although, if you went “chalk” in the West region, you’re good for the Sweet Sixteen! Anyhow, Enjoy!
COACHES
Wish I were him: Rick Pitino, Louisville
Glad I’m not him: John Thompson III, Georgetown
Lucky guy: Dr. John Giannini, LaSalle
Poor guy: John Groce, Illinois
Desperately seeking a wake-up call: Tom Creen, Indiana
Desperately seeking a P.R. man: Gregg Marshall, Wichita State (honorable mention: Andy Endfield, Florida Gulf Coast)
Desperately seeking sunglasses and a fake beard: Mark Few, Gonzaga
TEAMS
Thought you’d kick butt, you did: Louisville (both rounds)
Thought you’d kick butt, you didn’t: Indiana (round 2)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you did: North Carolina A&T (round 1)
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you didn’t: Florida Gulf Coast (both rounds)
Thought you wouldn’t kick butt, you did: Iowa State (round 1)
Dang, they’re good: Louisville
Dang, they’re bad: Akron
Can’t Stand Prosperity: Gonzaga
Did the season start? St. Louis
Can the season end? Kentucky (yeah, I know, not even in the tourney, but they were one-and-done in the NIT!)
Can the season never end? Oregon (honorable mention: Florida Gulf Coast)
GAMES
Play this again: Marquette 74, Butler 72
Never play this again: VCU 88, Akron 42
What? Oregon 68, Oklahoma State 55
Huh? Florida Gulf Coast 78, Georgetown 68
Are you kidding me? Oregon 74, St. Louis 57
Oh – my – God: Wichita St. 76, Gonzaga 70
Told you so: Minnesota 83, UCLA 63
NEXT WEEK
Ticket to die for: Indiana vs. Syracuse, also Michigan State vs. Duke
Best non-Big Six vs. Big Six matchup: Florida vs. Florida Gulf Coast
Best non-Big Six matchup: Wichita State vs. LaSalle
Upset alert: Michigan vs. Kansas
Must win: (all of them: duh!)
Great game no one is talking about: Miami vs. Marquette
College Football Drills in Wintertime February 28, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: 06:00, 6 A.M., 6 AM, 6 AM's, ball, Clemson, coach, college, conditioning, Cup, directional, drills, football, Fulmer, Georgia, Jim Colletto, Joe Tiller, Mark Richt, mat, Mollenkopf, NCAA, North Texas, practice, puke, Purdue, spring, Sun Belt, winter
add a comment
We are still in the winter season, normally associated with basketball, wrestling (the non-pro kind!) and Winter Olympic-related sports. The Super Bowl has been concluded for almost a month by now, and the college football bowl games have been over for almost two. But do not think that nothing is going on in the world of college football; things are anything but sleepy in that world right now, and I don’t mean the latest developments in the Fulmer Cup, either!
The truth is, college football is very active right now, just not active in the way that ordinary fans, hard-core and casual alike, can readily see or discern. That is because fans do not see the tough conditioning drills that players put themselves through (scratch that, that COACHES put players through) during the week, often at very inconvenient times of day, to get them ready for Spring Ball.
Conditioning is the game, here. The NCAA restricts coaches to 15 spring practice sessions, so there’s no time to waste on gassers or the like when there’s plenty of schematic options to explore to see how they play out and to try to install new offensive stuff for the regular season come Fall.
That means that these boys need to be in shape for all of that. What is truly interesting is all the different approaches that coaching staffs take towards these conditioning sessions, starting with what their nomenclature. One generic, all-purpose term is “winter conditioning drills,” since they last from early February, usually, to early March, though that alone varies from program to program. Another term some teams use is “mat drills,” since some of the conditioning drills take place on wrestling mats or a similar playing surface. At Purdue, we just called them “6 AM’s”, since that’s when these drills officially began.
Six-AM’s are a royal pain in the ass. There, I said it. Some coaches seem to agree, with is why schools of thought differ even on this approach, since some programs WISELY undertake these conditioning sessions in the AFTERNOON (why, what a novel idea!). As disastrous a head coach as Jim Colletto was while at Purdue, one of the few bright spots during an otherwise dark time for the program was that he had said conditioning drills held in the afternoon, when normal people are still, you know, functional. Coach Joe Tiller, however, in a hasty move to — otherwise commendably — change the tone of the program (and goodness knows it needed a change of tone at the time) had them in the morning, hence the term at the beginning of this paragraph.
But Purdue is not the only one; many a program from UConn to USC has had these sessions at 06:00, for whatever reason. Luckily, there are voices of reason at big-time programs that still have them in the afternoon. Take Georgia, for example (this policy alone strengthens my faith in Mark Richt’s adept leadership):
FYI, those human-centipede push-ups are a lot harder than they look! Notice the presence of a red mat in the middle of the indoor practice field, though. We never used a mat for drills on the astroturf playing field of Mollenkopf Athletic Center (field turf was finally installed in there in 2006), which might account for the absence of the mat drill term within our organizational lexicon.
Still, another interesting thing to marvel is what sort of combination of drills the coaches prefer to get their players into shape. We never did the human-centipede push-up drill at Purdue, for example, but one constant one will find from program to program are all sorts of directional drills. Those are simply where the coaches have players run or side-shuffle in one direction then instantly turn to run in a different direction and so on. Players would go to various drill stations throughout the session and about four or five-minute intervals, and variations of directional drills were usually two out of several of said stations. Because two stories of staircases leading to the coaches’ offices were located close to the indoor field, another station was to have players run up and down said stairs — ensuring that endurance and power were covered!
Clemson is considered a big-time program, but sadly they still cling to the out-dated notion of having drills pre-dawn. North Texas, an inconsistent contender in the Sun Belt, also still have their sessions before sunrise.
Notice the good examples of directional drills show in the above video. The tug-of-war drill is no doubt a cool idea! Another constant one sees during these drills from program to program are the puke buckets. Part of the job of the managers are to set up these drills (meaning they must report around 5:30 AM), and part of the setting-up is placing those plastic, dark gray garbage cans in, er, strategic areas for players to conveniently access in the split second before they blow hash. On further review, one advantage to running before dawn is that one needs not to worry about losing one’s breakfast!
At Purdue, after the players were thoroughly worn out from all the drills, to cap things off, the coaches had them run 100-yard wind sprints repeatedly. After all of that, the session would not be completed until all the players on the team did positioning drills (lie on your back, the whistle blows, then you instantly switch to lying on your chest, etc.) to the coaches’ satisfaction. Doing these twice a week to start out seemed manageable. Three times a week and it wears considerably on you; but at four times a week, it pushes you towards the brink of insanity, and makes you jump for joy when it comes time for spring practices to commence. At least we could brag, though, that we practiced while [normal] people slept!
Addendum, 04-03-13: Yes, by now, spring practices are in full-swing all across the land, but I just came across a video of Purdue’s 6 AM drills for 2013, and naturally found that to be a great fit for the article — enjoy!
You too can put together a Top 25 CFB preseason poll! February 17, 2013
Posted by intellectualgridiron in Sports.Tags: ACC, Alabama, AP, Auburn, B1G, Big 10, Big 12, Big East, Big Ten, Big XII, Boise State, Braxton Miller, Cal, Charlie Weis, Cincinnati, Clemson, college, conference, Duke, Florida, Florida State, football, Georgia, Georgia Tech, Kansas, Kansas State, Louisville, LSU, MAC, Manti Te'o, Michigan, Michigan State, Mississippi, NCAA, Nebraska, Northern Illinois, Northwestern, Notre Dame, Ohio State, Oklahoma, Ole Miss, Oregon, Pac-12, preseason, Purdue, ranking, San Jose State, SEC, South Carolina, Stanford, Texas, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Tim Tebow, Tommy Tuberville, top 25, UC, Urban Meyer, USC, Utah State, Vanderbilt, West Virginia, Will Muschamp
add a comment
Ever wanted to make a college football Top-25 preseason ranking but just didn’t know how? Well, now you do! Thanks to the hilarious writers at SBNation’s Every Day Should Be Saturday, we now have a guide at our disposal to put such a list together and look like prognostication geniuses in so doing! I have taken the liberty of quoting the guiding text to give you reference while we play along. The quoted text from the actual (and funny) guide page is given in italics.
1. Alabama. Look, maybe you have a perfectly strong case for some other school, but if you go off the reservation right away, the readers are going to suspect something is amiss. Stay with the pack here and, if the Tide stumble, you’ll be one of many mistaken scribes, not a distinct and lonesome idiot.
Alabama looks and sounds like a winner to me!
2. Big 12 or Big Ten team. BOOM! Because you started comfortable, those stupid readers didn’t see this knowledge roundhouse coming. Pick a team that didn’t meet expectations in 2012 and talk about how they’ll be “hungry” and “focused” because of it.
Michigan, perhaps?
3. SEC team. Mention how battle tested playing in the conference will leave this team by the end of the season. Then hedge by saying SEC play could eat them alive. SPORTSNIGMA!
Texas A&M; they’re really hot right now. Seriously, so much for them having to get behind Arkansas like we all predicted last year!
4. Ohio State. Emphasize how good the team looked in the first year of a new system. Ignore that they barely beat Cal, Indiana, and Purdue. Clunky suggestion that Braxton Miller could be the next Tim Tebow. Obliquely suggest Urban Meyer could quit at any week for any reason.
Ohio State, and this is why I didn’t put them at the No. 2 spot like I would have otherwise.
5. Oregon or Stanford. Sh-t, you meant to put one of them higher, but that much backspacing seems like a real pain in the ass. Say something here about how you’re being cautious not to put too much stock into a big bowl performance.
Stanford, for reasons of coaching continuity.
6. Team Coming Off A Big Bowl Performance. Clemson-Louisville national championship game ahoy!
Okay, I’ll bite. What the heck; let’s put Louisville in there for the fun of it!
7. SEC team. Which one? Any one THAT’S JUST HOW DAMN GOOD THEY ARE MAN. (Seriously, though, not Auburn.)
Seriously; definitely not Auburn! Already put Texas A&M in there, so let’s have LSU fill this slot, shall we? Or maybe South Carolina; yeah, definitely the Gamecocks. They’re doing quite well right now.
8. Notre Dame. Yes, Irish fans are going to be super pissed at the perceived disrespect, but that’d be true even if you ranked ND numbers one, two, and three simultaneously. Don’t fight a losing battle. Just slot them here and suggest that they could be better off without Manti Te’o.
Notre Dame; and they might not miss Manti Te’o that much if their highly-ranked recruiting class has any teeth to it, unlike “highly-ranked” recruiting classes under Charlie Weis.
9. Oregon or Stanford (whoever you didn’t put at 5). Say something about how they’ve lost a lot of key pieces. Is it true? Players graduate, don’t they?
Oregon, for reasons of lack of coaching continuity.
10. ACC team. You’ll need to construct a paper fortune teller and write the names of four plausibly successful teams twice each. Be sure you only do it twice, because if you write out “Georgia Tech” three times on the same piece of paper Paul Johnson appears out of nowhere and insists on rearranging your pantry.
Well, we already put Louisville at No. 6, so we might as well put Florida State into this one.
11. Team that will likely have three losses before Halloween. Your obligation in preparing this ranking is not simply to come up with a sensible accounting of the top 25 teams heading into the season. It’s also to provide us with teams destined to leave unreasonable expectations unfulfilled. Who will be this year’s Arkansas? THE POWER IS YOURS!
Ole Miss, because expectations are high due to their half-way decent team from last year and No. 7-ranked recruiting class this year.
12. Team with the highest ranked recruiting class that you have not yet included. I mean, all that talent wouldn’t be going to a bad team, would it? And I bet half of them start right away! (note: I do not know how recruiting works)
I want to put Florida here, because they’ve got the No. 4-ranked recruiting class, and I’ve got to stick ‘em somewhere! But, skip down to No 14, and you’ll find out that cannot be done, according to this system. So, we’ll put in Oklahoma.
13. This is exhausting. You really deserve a lemonade, and maybe even an oatmeal cookie. I mean, people bitch about preseason rankings, but then they lap them right up like hungry dogs. Do they not understand how market forces work? Oh, um, Michigan State. Whatever.
Georgia; gotta stick ‘em somewhere.
14. Florida. “Will Muschamp is driving a truck with a great engine and no brake pads. Will Muschamp is eating a sandwich with meat and no bread. Will Muschamp is developing a model that explains how light behaves like a particle but not as a wave.” Metaphor them to death in this middle section.
Okay, NOW we’re allowed to put Florida in there.
15. School that was good six years ago and has stunk since. Because these things are cyclical, or something.
USC, anybody?
16. Team stocked with seniors that have mostly underachieved up to this point. They just want it more, man. That’s why they’re fighting in spring practice. Out of love.
Michigan State, perhaps?
17. Big 12 team with a miserably weak non conference schedule. Basically, this is between Texas Tech, West Virginia, Kansas, and Kansas State. Kansas is out for reasons of being Kansas, so just pick one of the other three and feel like a genius up to, but not beyond, Week 5.
West Virginia is the safest pick out of the three, at least through Week 5. After Week 5, it might be Texas Tech. Just sayin’.
18. Big East team. Start out by noting that the conference had a better bowl winning percentage last year than the every other AQ conference. Pretend you knew that Memphis was joining this year without looking. Realize that the team you pick could join the ACC before this gets published. Shrug, and continue trying to beat Jetpack Joyride.
Cincinnati, because after U of L, UC is the only Big East team that comes to mind, and goodness knows what could happen with Tommy Tuberville at the helm.
19. Team that was terrible but hired a trendy coach. You’ve already won me over, Cal, in spite of me.
Okay, let’s go with Cal. Let me waste another space on something ridiculous, why don’t you!
20. School from a non AQ conference. Again, this is mostly an exercise in antagonizing fans, so just find a Mountain West or MAC team that could plausibly win eight games and put them here. Then say something snide about the Big Ten.
Ah, so THIS is where you put in Boise State!
21. Scandium. Don’t think it belongs here? Check your atomic numbers, clown.
Okay, now they’re being downright silly. Not funny, just silly. Let’s go with LSU.
22. Team with a coach on the hot seat. If you’re not sure who qualifies, just pick any coach that hasn’t won a conference title in the last two years and say he’s on the hot seat.
Texas, because even though I love Mack Brown as a person, he ought to be on the hot seat after three consecutive seasons of underperformance.
23. Almost there! Pick any team, say this is a make-or-break season for the program, and move forward.
Auburn, because after the horrible year they had last season, we’ll now see how quickly they can bounce back.
24. Duke.
Are you kidding me? Alright, we’ll play along for the funny hell of it.
25. Team that barely made a bowl last year. “Trial by fire has made them stronger” sounds way more optimistic than “holy sh– they needed a punt return touchdown to beat Sweet Valley High.”
Heck, Purdue barely made it to a bowl game last year, but I’m certainly not putting them at No. 25! I’d put somebody like Nebraska in there, but I don’t know if it fits the template. Screw it; I’ll put Nebraska in anyway.
Now, let us see how this ranking plays out, according to the above formula:
- Alabama
- Michigan
- Texas A&M
- Ohio State
- Stanford
- Louisville
- South Carolina
- Notre Dame
- Oregon
- Florida State
- Ole Miss
- Oklahoma
- Georgia
- Florida
- USC
- Michigan State
- West Virginia
- Cincinnati
- Cal
- Boise State
- LSU
- Texas
- Auburn
- Duke (groan!)
- Nebraska
I know, I know; LSU is ranked way too low, and it bothers the heck out of me, too. Just for fun, let us compare this with the current 2013 AP preseason Top 25 poll:
- Alabama (no surprise there!)
- Oregon
- Ohio State
- Notre Dame
- Texas A&M
- Georgia
- Stanford
- South Carolina
- Florida
- Florida State
- Clemson
- Kansas State
- Louisville
- LSU (beats not being ranked at all!)
- Oklahoma (I knew they were overvalued!)
- Utah State (there had better be a darn good reason for this!)
- Northwestern (quite plausible, actually)
- Boise State (are you sure you want them that high, AP?)
- Texas
- Oregon State
- San Jose State (huh?)
- Northern Illinois (I guess they felt compelled to stick a MAC team somewhere)
- Vanderbilt (also plausible; have you seen their recruiting class lately?)
- Michigan
- Nebraska
For starters, I’m really regretting sticking Michigan in that No. 2 slot, but the formula called for a Big Ten team, and Ohio State was already locked in to No. 4; what was I to do? The Florida State ranking, though, seems pretty spot-on, and many others (Alabama, Ohio State, Texas A&M, Stanford, South Carolina, and Nebraska are within one or two rankings). Yes, it’s all in fun and jest, to be sure, but it shows that sometimes these whacky formulas work, other times, not so much. And it still sticks in my craw that it compelled me to under-value the Bayou Bengals, and grossly over-value Michigan.
intellectualgridiron 